Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Desperate Housemates

I got made famous now thanks to 5xmom's meme and summore she had to tag me too! OK, here's how it works;

The Tag:

"You are in an alternate universe. You are a single person not involved in any relationship, and you have just published a New York Times bestseller. A movie studio has invited you to Hollywood to talk about a movie deal for three days, and as part of the wooing process, they offer to host a one-on-one dinner each night with the celebrity of your choice. Who would you pick? It could be a star you want to have a shot at 'hooking up' with, or it could just be someone you admire."

1) My first celebrity would definitely has to be Lilian Chan aka 5xmom. She is no doubt the Queen Kong of the celebrity bloggers. She's perfect for my movie and I wouldn't want anyone to take her role in my up-coming movie because she has the techniques and years of experience guaranteed to please anybody and I dare not think what would happen on a date with her!

2) Second to star in the movie would have to be Yvy the teh tarik addict. This one also very lihai one and would fit in perfectly with Lilian. However she's a bit shy shy about showing her face so I may have to hire a face double for the role! I just hope she doesn't cover her face when we go out on the date.

3) Last one will have to go to Helen of Troy. This woman caused the demise of an entire civilisation and men killed because of her so definitely must have her on the movie. I'm damn lucky to have the opportunity to woo her!

And the story of the movie is about...

...DESPERATE HOUSEMATES! Its a story about 3 bloggers who had to go to America because of some blogging business and that they had to stay there for 6 months! So they decided to rent a house on Wisteria Lane and live together as housemates.

After one month away from their loved ones they started to become quite desperate. Lilian was missing ATM, Yvy missing Ted in Sydney and Helen of Troy missed her Paris!

Wait, there's more! We must also have a gardener in Desperate Housemates and the perfect guy to play him would be Jeremy C of course! He will be the guy which the Desperate Housemates would fight over coz he's always outside the house flexing his muscles when he's working which make the 3 housemates even more desperate.

And the rest of the story pretty much involves lots and lots of hard core unadulterated wanton animal lusts with boy/girl action, girl/boy/girl action, girl/girl/girl action...

Monday, February 27, 2006

The Mootrix

Amelia is my guest blogger for the day while I sit back and relax a bit. This is her post and its dedicated to Jeremy C. I just help write, photoshop and publish it!

My name is Jeremy and I'm a public servant so I day dream and blog all day when I'm at work! Sometimes I have a feeling that the life I live is not quite what it seems, like something's not quite real. Like an artificial world made up to accomodate us.. To me, when I'm on the net and blogging I feel more myself than when I'm in the real world. When I'm in cyberspace my daily grinding boring life does not exist, here I can be free to be who I've always thought I am, here I am Neo!

I also feel the need to eat fresh grass out in the green fields, I dream of green rolling hills and cows on the paddock almost all the times but why do I do that? I ask myself that question everyday until one day I met Trinity whom I've heard of in cyberspace. Trinity introduced me to...

...Moopheus and from that day onwards I saw a world beyond mine which I've never thought existed! Moopheus show me my true self, who I am and what I can do if I just put my mind to it!

I've learnt a lot since that day like dodging bullets and wearing cool black clothes and doing kungfu and jumping off skyscrapers and flying! Now I know my previous life as a public servant was just a lie and that I was just one of the slaves born to serve the greater evil that made me look like human when in reality I am a bull and I'm full of bullshit that I can harness to save all my fellow bulls and cows from the evil the enslave us all...

...The Mootrix! I am Neo and my purpose in life is to rescue all the cows from The Mootrix as was told by the Oracle, so it shall be done!

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Luna Park

It is after all the weekend so let's go have some fun, at Luna Park in St. Kilda. I'm going to ride every ride in the park, I haven't been on one of these rides since God knows how long ago!

Luna Park unfortunately only opens on the weekends because of low attendance during the weekdays unlike its Sydney counterpart which has more customers so its open everyday.

This is the first ride I went on where the spider spins you round and round and up and down, child's play I say..give me something more scary!

Carousel? Forget it! I'm not 3 years old, give me something that would scare the shit out of me! C'mon! I'm dissapointed now, is this all they got? Let's check out the other rides..

Oo..ghost train..scary! But seriously, judging from this long queue you would expect something really cool right? Sad fact is its not scary enough for me, maybe I'm too old for these sort of stuffs..sad.

Got on the scenic railway, bit like the roller coaster but maybe the baby brother of it. Still enough to get people screaming their lungs out! No I need something better, how about this..

Holy guacamole! Don't know what its called but it spins you round and round and upside down! Shit! I could taste me lunch in my throat now. By the end of the ride, I was so nauseated that I didn't want to play anymore..yes I know, I'm such a wimp, a pussy!

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Bad Days Are Made Of These..

Amelia sent me these wondrous pictures and I just want to share them with everyone. I've added a few dialogues in just for fun.

Most people can relate to this one and I'm no different but thank God for clothes dryer!

Farmers are doing it tough in America's heartland, this is a common occurance. Daisy going to heaven..literally!

Native Americans are good rain makers, sometimes too good. Send some rain over down under, we are thirsty.

You can't get good help these days, farm hands are usually found sleeping on the job out in the corn fields but sometimes they overslept..

I've been going to hokkien class at Sisuahlai's school of hokkien and thought I show off my hokkien. Sisuahlai will be proud of me and give me straight A's!

3 cheers for Amelia!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Of Fire Drill & Office Gossips

Yesterday we had a fire drill in the office, we had never had a fire drill in this place before so why now? Oh well, I supposed its required by law so we all know what to do when the real thing happens.

Our appointed fire warden Michelle brief us that when the drill starts we are to drop everything and proceed to the designated spot outside the building where we will be away from harm's way. So I'm all prepared, I took all my things ready including my camera coz who knows someone might come into the building when its empty and steal something! Not taking any chances!

After a few minutes Michelle told everyone the drill has started and we are to proceed as planned so very orderly we all walked out of the building in a calm manner. I wonder if it would be this orderly if the real thing happened! I'll be crying 'Help! Save Me! I don't wanna die!'.

The designated spot was about 150 meters away! I found out that we were not the only people doing the drill but the entire building block of different offices were required to participate as well! Lucky it was a nice day and the walk was kind of nice so when we got there everyone was just standing around gossiping among themselves. We all know that office gossips happen everyday and everywhere so I want to gossip also today!

These are the people from my office; the first one from the right is Alan the big kahuna of the joint we rent our office from, the one after him is Danny the quality controller I think. He dresses nicely everyday and workout in the gym too..I suspect he's a poof! (gay) The girl next to Danny in the white shirt is Kee, she's nice but she lives with her boyfriend who's an angmoh! The woman in the middle of the picture I can't remember her name but I heard she was a whore when a group of them went to LA on some buying trip! She flirted with everyone! Very hiaw one! And standing next to her is Effie, she's a machinist but I have no goss on her..sorry. That's all I got. Phew! I managed to kill some time standing here waiting for our next instruction.

15 minutes later we were told we could all go back in, what a waste of time! If the real fire comes we are supposed to know what to do now so we won't get roasted like pork on a spit!

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

KL Cafe

KL Cafe is situated on trendy Acland street in St. Kilda. It specialises in malaysian, chinese and thai cuisines and this was the first time I'm going there to try out the foods.

KL Cafe has an older sibling restaurant in Elsternwick called Kotaraya and the two restaurants have similar foods on their menus. Both restaurants also share same owners.

The interior is more contemporary than its sibling restaurant thus enticing more younger patrons in the areas.

It has a nice ambience which adds a nice subtle-ness to the place. They also have a blackhole in the ceiling!

It also won a few awards in the few years since its opening in 1999 so I hope I wan't be dissapointed by the foods.

I ordered the Ipoh Hor Fun, yes I know I like Hor Fun too much but I think they don't take presentations too seriously coz it looks hideous! But to be fair, I must admit it tasted quite good so I'll give it 1 thumb up.

Terese ordered the Gado-gado and well..you judge for yourself if you like the look of it! Again we were quite surprise when we had a taste of it which was quite good! Another 1 thumb up.

Overall KL Cafe is ok to go for a quick meal if you were in the area but I wouldn't go there too often coz the prices are a bit much for what you get!

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Siao Cha Bor!

We're still at the japanese festival from yesterday. There was an interesting japanese entertainer whose name I forgot coz japanese names are hard to remember! So I'll just call her "Siao Cha Bor" not in any way refering to our blogger friend of the same name whom I'm sure is not as "siao" as this japanese entertainer.

By the way, in case you don't know what "Siao Cha Bor" means, its basically "Crazy Woman". "Siao" is crazy and "Cha Bor" is woman or girl.

Here's Siao Cha Bor at the beginning of the act where she's just singing a terrible english song! Nice hair-do and dress she has on right?

Then all of a sudden the music changed and she started ripping her dress off and waved it above her head like she's possessed! She's strip right down to her leopard skin undies and kept on gyrating around to the music much to the amusements of the audiences!

Tossing her dress away she started dancing around like a real siao cha bor! I thought this was a family show and we have kiddies in the audience but she kept on dancing in her undies like there's not a care in the world.

So then she started dancing amongst the audience and groping this guy from the audience! The guy was extremely embarrassed but he didn't shun her away though.

In fact he started dancing with her! That's being a real sport buddy! Good on you! I'm sure the girlfriend didn't mind, in fact she was literally rolling on the grass laughing her ass off!

This went on for quite a while and I think this guy was beginning to enjoy it way too much! Later she let him go and proceeded to do other silly things like dancing with a skipping rope and playing with water and other "siao" things.

Finally the show ends...but the crowd loved her and cheered like mad! Siao Cha Bor indeed!

Monday, February 20, 2006


Melbourne and Osaka are sister cities (why does one sister speaks english and the other speaks japanese?). Every year Melbourne city hosts a little event to reaffirm our ties to the sister city of Osaka by means of a little japanese festival so they can promote tourism in Japan and have a taste of japanese life styles.

There are japanese drum performers by the students in a particular japanese drum school here. They are actually very spectacular, love the beatings of the drums like thunders!

There's best dressed japanese birds in their traditional kimono I think or maybe its called something else I don't know, I could be wrong. Anyway the winner is the one with the peace sign, 3rd from the right.

Some japanese dance which I can't remember what its called now but it involves dancing in a circle and waving your arms in the movements of working in the fields and other domestic lives back in Japan. Everyone is encouraged to join in but I was too busy with the camera so I was excused!

Know how to do origami! These volunteers spent all afternoon teaching and showing anyone who wants to learn how to make beautiful paper animals and stuffs. Gotta love the volunteers!

Ahh..love this, the Japanese Tea Ceremony. The japanese are very finicky about drinking their teas, what utensils to use, how to boil the water, how to clean the bowls and how to serve it! Aiyah, just give me one teh-o-peng saja lah and I'll gobble it down in 2 seconds!

Japanese caligraphy, I don't know what he's written but it looks like a piece of artwork you can put on the wall. Maybe someone might just buy it and do just that.

This japanese lady plays her instrument well, coupled with her singing in some japanese traditional song. I bet most of the audiences don't know what she was singing about so even if she screws up, its ok coz no one knows!

Aww...ain't that the cutest brother and sisters you ever seen! That's the fruits of good relations between Osaka and Melbourne..hehe.

Japanese honey cakes, they look good but I didn't get to sample any because the line was like a mile long! Next time maybe.

Japanese chess, looks like chinese chess too. Like the one you see in martial art movies just before they're about to draw their swords and fight to the death!

Speaking of martial arts, some demonstrations of Kendo, the japanese art of swordmanship. This is what you need to learn if you want to be a samurai, a ninja or a jedi.

These two are showing you what you can do when you learn Kendo, with a sword you have an advantage over someone who's only got a stick. But a long stick he has so the odds may be stacked against him!

Check it out, real samurai warriors complete with their katana swards too! I sked liao! Sumimasen! Sayonara!

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Acland Street In St. Kilda

I haven't been to St. Kilda in a long time and last weekend we did when we went to farewell the yachts off. St. Kilda is Alex Allied's territory so when you come down here, you have to pay homage to tai kor first!

This is Acland Street in St. Kilda the most popular street in this suburb where most people come for the restaurants and all the arty farty shops they have here.

This place is always full of people just hanging around like a bad smell. I decided to join in! Have to go with the flow man! When you're in Rome do what the romans do, in this case its St. Kilda.

Trompoline is a local ice cream shop here and its always choke full of customers on a hot day like today. I think that lady spotted me taking this picture but lucky she didn't tell me off! Siao lah!

Like I said the place is full of wacky shops like this hair salon with the rocket on the roof. Maybe the hair-stylist is an alien who flies in to work and back in that rocket.

Not wanting to loose to that rocket salon, this salon's owner wanted to be more wacky by putting a 'party on the beach' on his roof! Ahh..keeping up with the competitions!